When determining the kind of wedding dress that is right for you,determining your specific body shape is a good place to start. Perhaps you carry more weight around your mid-section and chest than you do your lower half, otherwise known as “top-heavy.” If this is the case, consider having a playful hemline that swishes about the knee instead of your ankles so you can show off your lovely calves. Your overall look doesn’t have to favor one half of your body, so you can lean towards embellishments being on the skirt while you keep jewelry simple. If you do not have a distinct waist, you can raise the skirt higher along the torso so your stomach is softened by an A-line bottom.

Perhaps you are what is known as “pear-shaped,” meaning that your lower-half is thicker than your upper half. If this is the case, look for a fitted top that will help accentuate your slimmer half and have a skirt that flair out slightly above the waist to help cloak the wide hips and thighs. Use design or eye-grabbing accessories to draw attention to your slimmer top to balance your overall aesthetic.

Above all else, select a dress that makes you feel sexy and comfortable. You should be enjoying yourself on your big day and not preoccupied with the task of “sucking it in.” When trying on dresses, move around in it as you would during your wedding; this means, sit down, walk around and maybe even dance a little in it. Remember, the thing that is going to truly make you shine as a bride is confidence and the elation that comes from knowing that you are marrying the love of your life.

Plus Size Princesses around the world brought in 2013 in style and shared their pics with me on Instagram (I’m PlusSizePrincess on IG), it was so much fun to see the different outfits that we all put together. Thank you to all the PSPs that participated, we’ll definitely do this again soon! For the full range of photos click #PSPNYE on instagram.

I started my New Years Eve at church, praying in the New Year with my sister who was in NYC with me. After service I met up with Robert, his brother and their friends at a party in the village. Church and the club definitely require different outfits so… I went from “Holy” to “Hoochie” in one night Here’s what I wore:

Old Navy stopped carrying their +size section in the store and moved it exclusively online but I’ve still been able to find clothes there. I never have a problem getting into an XL or XXL dresses or sweater in the stores (I’m working on fitting into their size 20 jeans, but I’m not there yet!). For the Hoochie portion of the evening, I took a knee length sequined skirt and wore it high on my waist to make it into a mini.

Shop my look:

It was hard to choose, but here are six of my favorite looks from the #PSPNYE feed. There was a great variety of casual looks as well as glamorous plus size dresses in the #PSPNYE feed, showing that there’s no right or wrong way to dress up for the New Year. Special shout out to Jwunderlin who borrowed her fur vest from her grandma (Love!)

Shop their looks:

This post was inspired by the online debates I’ve seen about Beyonce showing her body, particularly the bottom of her breasts on the cover of GQ this month. I guess Body Policing can happen even if you have a perfect body!

When I was 13 my best friend Jennifer and I got matching pink/purple spaghetti strapped tank tops (this was right before she “stole my boyfriend” and I had to go all 90210 on her, but I digress). Matching outfits with my best friend was a huge deal for me because she was 5’1 and skinny and I was a 5’10 Plus Size Princess in puberty who already had D cup breasts. As you can imagine, finding a cute top that fit both of us was a pretty daunting task.

One day, we decided that we would wear our cute little tanks to dance class at our performing arts school. Intermediate Jazz was business as usual, a warm up… across the floor exercises and then choreography to our favorite songs. If you know anything about a good workout/dance class, the high you feel is amazing… by the end of class we were a bundle of happy energy and endorphins. Going to the School of the Arts meant that I was able to get that feeling in school twice a week with all my friends. This was heaven to me so, when my dance teacher asked to speak to me after class I bounced over to her almost giddily.

“Yes, Ms. V?” I said, pulling my duffel bag onto my shoulder.

“CeCe, I don’t want you wearing that tank top in my class anymore. You need to bring tops that cover your breasts.” Ms. V said, curtly.

Her comments brought my emotions down from a dancers high at a rate so fast it stung. I was mortified. I blinked, quickly… taking in not only what she said, but the way she said it. Ms. V had never been mean to me, but today her voice had a slight edge to it. Her request wasn’t terrible but it was almost like I had offended her.

All the girls wore tank tops to dance class, but according to Ms. V, I could not. Being a teenage PSP, I often felt boxed out of trends that my peers were rocking because they just didn’t make those things in my size. So that pink/purple tank top meant a lot to me. Now, I was feeling boxed out again… My skinny bff, was by no means flat chested but she wasn’t asked to cover her breasts. The tank was okay on her, but not on me. She was okay seeing the moderate size breasts in tank tops, but my full breasts were too much.

We’re okay if Beyonce shows traditional “top of breast” cleavage, but seeing the bottom of her breasts is over the line- how do we decide these things?

Looking back, could I have worn something less revealing to dance class? Sure! Was her request outrageous? Not really. It was a good teaching moment, because at that age I was still learning my body and what was appropriate (my Mom probably would have told me to pack a different top for dance class, had she seen what I had planned to wear).

I think the hardest part about that moment for me is that I felt judged.

When you have large breasts on a plus size body it’s almost as if your breasts become a punch line. An extension of a body that already takes up “too much space”. Suddenly, your body becomes public domain and everyone had an opinion on how your body is represented.

Body Policing comes in many different forms “you’re too big wear that”, “that’s not age-appropriate”, “you’re a mom now”… how often to we hear (or say) things like that? I know I do. But I’m starting to wonder if that’s a form of body policing… what do you think?

Should we judge how much skin people (of all sizes) show?

Today at 4pm EST, I’ll be doing a live #curvyconvo chat on about PCOS on twitter and facebook. PCOS stands for Polyciystic Ovarian Syndrome and a LOT of Plus Size Princesses have it, whether they know it or not.

I have PCOS and I think its important to discuss it from time to time because there is often a connection between the syndrome and weight. My initial post on PCOS can be found here and a small debate about PCOS and weight can be found here, you can also click on the PCOS tag on the blog to see everything we’ve discussed so far.

The conversation will continue this afternoon at 4pm, hopefully you’ll log on and share/ask questions.

Now onto our Plus Size Princess Fitness Challenge! You guys are inspiring me by hitting the ground running this week, here are a few of the girls who are rocking this challenge by eating well, working out 4 times a week and logging their efforts on twitter/instagram:

We are off to a great start! #PSPfit

“I really want to make things work with her,” a male acquaintance of mine said during a birthday dinner. “Part of me wonders if I’m determined to make things work because I worked so hard to get her. I mean, I really chased her in the beginning.” He took a sip of his drink and I waited patiently for him to continue.

Its not often that I get to listen to a straight guy analyze his relationship, so I was all ears! (I won’t detail this guys relationship issues, but he’s got some very legit reasons why he’s working things out with his girl.) Anyway, he explained to me that he used his best “game” to get his girlfriend years ago. He had wined her and dined her and won her over, so even though things weren’t perfect now, the memories of what he had done to get her when they first met helped him to hold on now.

Of course as he spoke, my mind drifted to my relationship with Robert.

Robert and I were “just friends” for a very long time. The elements of a romantic relationship were always there, but no lines were crossed, ever. Those of you who have been with me through the whole “Um… Are We Dating?” story on this blog have watched the progression of CeCe & Robert from coworkers, to friendship to dating unfold. You also know how other guys treated me and I think in those other relationships (particularly with Kevin and Adrian) there was a stronger “chase” element.

Hmmm… I thought to myself, Robert didn’t really “chase” me… we just spent time together, became friends and things developed over time. Should I have made him work harder to “get me”? Do guys really need “the chase” to be fully vested in a relationship?

My male acquaintance continued to talk through his relationship issues. “But you know,” he continued “Because I spent so much time chasing her, we never became friends. We’re trying to build a solid friendship now, but its hard to go backwards. If I had come at things differently from the start, learned about her… what she likes… what she doesn’t like… and then seen where things went- I think our relationship now would be much better now.”

Whoa, I couldn’t help but smile, what he described is pretty much how things unfolded with Robert and me. By the time Robert and I went on our first date, he knew so much about me. And the more time we spend together, the more he learns. There is a comfort level that we have that didn’t exist with the guys that chased me, but maybe that’s not a bad thing.

It might not be as overt as when guys run game, but I see Robert work to impress me and make me happy and I appreciate it. When it comes to courtship, I think that being friends first has its pros and cons. But in relationships I’m starting to think that the friendship foundation is key.

At the end of the day, the guys who “put in work to get me” aren’t around anymore… and Mr. “Friends First”, Robert is still here, so maybe that’s my answer… time will tell.

Do YOU believe in being friends first?

Happy New Year, Lovelies!

2013 has started off with something super fun. I’m featured in this months issue of Plus Model Magazine! PMM asked five bloggers to share their fall/winter style… mine was color.

This was also one of the last photo shoots I did with my natural hair out of braids, I had just gotten a cut/flat iron. I’m so happy with how healthy it is right now.

Coincidentally, as you flip through this months issue, you’ll notice that the Rachel Pally dress I’m wearing is featured in another spread worn by the fabulous +size model, Marquita Pring. At first I kind of panicked at the idea of being compared to a +size model in the same dress, but then I reminded myself that when it comes to +size fashion, our different body shapes can make outfits look completely different from one Plus Size Princess to another. So, here’s a chance for you guys to see the same dress on two very different bodies.

The fact that we’re both rocking the same dress goes to show that it’s always good to try things on even if you think it might not work for you… you never know!

Thanks to Plus Model Mag for featuring me! Be sure to check out the rest of this months issue here. A lot of you ask where I get my wide calf boots, check out my fave affordable boots below!