Sunday Brunch is one of my favorite things; especially in New York City where it often includes unlimited champagne and/or mimosas.

After church this past Sunday, my friend Maya and I decided to have brunch on the Upper West Side. I was catching her up on the new guy when a group of people walked into the restaurant. One of the girls among them was really pretty with long hair, a Miu Miu bag and a black summer dress.

“I know her…” I said to Maya as the group sat down at a table across from us. I began to go through my mental Rolodex to see how I knew her. Did we have a mutual friend? Had we attended an event together? Then it hit me… “she’s a model!” I said, snapping my fingers as it all clicked. Maya casually turned around, “Oh yeah, she looks really familiar!”

I was so busy taking her in… her style, her hair and her amazingly curvy body that I didn’t realize she was looking right back at me. I smiled (out of embarrassment) and she smiled back. Before I knew it, I was mouthing across the restaurant Are you a model? She nodded politely and then I went back to my food so I wouldn’t seem like a stalker.

The more I thought about it, things began to sink in. She wasn’t just any Plus Size model, she was Ashley Graham, the model at the center of the Lane Bryant vs. Network Television controversy. Living in New York I see celebs all the time and with all of the New York Fashion Week and Full Figured Fashion Week events I’ve been invited to this year, I’m pretty calm around my favorite models, but for some reason I really wanted to say hello to her.

On my way out, I took a deep breath and stopped at her table. I noticed that she had her Bible next to her purse. I wanted to say Did you just come from church? I just came from church too! but that would have been pretty corny, so instead I said:

“Hi, I’m CeCe… would it be possible for me to take a photo of you for my blog?”

“Hi, CeCe. I’m Ashley… of course!” she stood up, flipped her hair and was effortlessly glamorous as I snapped a photo on my iPhone.

Isn’t she pretty?!

♥ ♥ ♥

A few months ago Denise, my sister/one of my best friends, called me. “I was catching up on your blog today. Who is this ‘Mike Lowery’ character that keeps commenting on your posts?” she asked.

“I have NO idea!” I replied laughing, “he always comments and I cant tell if he hates me or if he’s just trying to give me a dose of reality.” We went back and forth about him for a while and then the conversation switched to other things. I didn’t think much more about Mike Lowrey until last week when I gave him a shout out at the end of my series on When A Man Gives You His Business Card. When I told Mike Lowrey to email me in that post, it wasn’t for anything in particular. I simply found it fascinating that a straight man would comment regularly and with such gusto on a blog about a Plus Size Princess.

A few days later I got an email in my inbox:

I thought my comments on your blog just annoyed everyone, lol. I’m glad to hear that my comments didn’t fall upon deaf ears so to speak. I think you’re an interesting young lady and I enjoy your writing style. Me…fascinating?? Thanks for the compliment. (Awww shucks Miss, after a compliment like that…I’m here at work with a Kool-Aid smile.)

Were you born in NY?

If I thought Mike Lowrey was “fascinating” before, his email intrigued me even more. (Quick Dating Tip: When talking to someone for the first time, especially via email, I always feel like ending with a question is a good way to move a conversation along and show interest in the other person). Mr. Lowrey was using one of my old tricks! I responded immediately:

Your comments don’t annoy me and they definitely do not fall on deaf ears. I’m originally from California… I moved to NYC for school.

Where are you from? Where do you live?

He responded pretty quickly and throughout the day, we continued to email back and forth. It was casual conversation, I learned that he grew up in New York City but moved out of state for work two years ago. Our conversations weren’t deep, but they were probing. We were both asking questions about the other person and I could feel an energy coming from our writing that said there was more beneath the surface.

That evening I had to attend an event. Although it was an open bar, I wasn’t really having a good time. I found myself in a corner emailing Mike from my iPhone. My email began like this:

I’m at a cocktail hour and while the drinks are good, the conversation is stale. I shouldn’t be emailing you, but… I am!

He responded:

I’m glad you did email me.
I must admit that I’ve been checking my phone every 20 minutes hoping to see an email from you. I’ll be in NYC Thursday night. Would it be too forward if I asked to meet you for happy hour next Friday? I would love to put a face to the person if you’re free. I promise to be on my very best behavior.

Reading his email gave me butterflies (I’m such a girl!). In 2010, the idea of a traditional blind date was exciting and terrifying. I emailed him back:

I can do a Friday night happy hour… Where should I meet you?

Okay, I definitely still hate my arms but ever since I wrote about it last week, your comments have been sooo helpful!

ChristenPhillips said…

hi, first time reading your blog, but I had to comment. YES… I totally struggle with my arms! But honestly, when you see other people out walking around do you find yourself being really critical or their arm fat? … in most cases, no. you never really notice and even if you do notice, you forget about it in the ext few seconds and move on. So, with that in mind… go wear your cute dresses and be happy!

Melissa W said…

UMM YESS! You hit the nail on the head. Some weeks I’m good, some weeks I hate them. But I do have to remember that it’s always worse than I think it is, and no one is really looking at your arms. This year I, too, will be going without shrugs, cardigans, and bolero jackets. It’s just too hot! WE CAN DO IT!

Jessica Downey said…

My friend at work and I were just talking about this today! I have such a hard time exposing my arms as well. But you know what I realized? Sometimes when I wear a jacket or sweater or some other cover up in the summer it makes me wonder if I look just as bad as I (think I) look with my bare arms exposed. And sometimes I wonder if I draw more attention to myself because I am the girl in the cute dress wearing a sweater in 90 degree heat. I love your attitude and I say rock it!

There were so many more encouraging comments that I’ve been pushing myself to the limit when it comes to arm exposure. I wore a racer back dress to the opening night of Full Figured Fashion Week and a Strapless dress to the finale! I didn’t even pack a shrug “just in case” like a usually do.

On the weekends I’ve been rocking jeans and tank tops and I even wore a spaghetti strap top when I was out at a bar last weekend. I’ve even been going to work with bare arms and throwing a cardigan on when I get to the office because 1.) its freezing in my office and 2.) I don’t think bare arms in the office are appropriate, (even if you’ve got guns like Michelle Obama!).

I also noticed something; a lot of my tops that do have sleeves still show 95% of my arms! Somehow I convince myself that because they technically have sleeves they offer more coverage. Not True!

This summer is going to be so much cooler….

Has anyone else been exposing your arms more?

Greetings from Full Figured Fashion Week!

Last night was another fun night… the runway competition was really fun. I’m super tired, but I wanted to give you some updates on the weekend and what’s going on.

First of all, I’m running a giveaway on Twitter! Figuresque dressed me for FFFWeek last night and I got a lot of compliments on my ensemble. They’ve got a great store and lots of fun clothes and they’re offering a $50 gift card to one lucky reader. All you have to do is Tweet “I follow @thebiggirlblog for #sonsifffweek & @Figuresque for #plussize #fashion!” and you’re entered to win!

Secondly, I got an email last week saying that Gemini Magazine, an Atlanta-based “curve-friendly” publication, and full figured fashion retail giant, Lane Bryant, are hosting an afternoon of cocktails and “intimate” fashion chat featuring the newest collection of Cacique® lingerie at the store’s Herald Square (NYC) location on June 19th—dedicated to helping full figured women to create a sexier, more beautiful self.

Sommer Johnson, publisher of Gemini Magazine is someone I met via Twitter, we became email friends, phone friends and she even gives me wake-up calls when I need to work out in the morning. I’m so excited to have her in NYC I feel like my Mom is coming to visit!She has a huge heart and she’s a beautiful person who is very dear to my heart even though we’ve never actually met!

So if you have time on Saturday at 1pm, you should pay her a visit, get some bras from Lane Bryant (I think its their Semi-Annual sale) and sip cocktails. When you see Sommer tell her that CeCe sent you!

Okay, I’m going to try to get some rest… I’ll check in with you later!

Last night was the opening of Full Figured Fashion Week™ in New York City. Walking in, I didn’t know what to expect but I was excited! When I got out of my cab, there was a line of gorgeous Plus Size Princesses waiting to get into BLVD, where the event was held. Because I was a guest of the Curvy Collective, I was whisked right inside and met up with some of the behind the scenes/press people associated with FFFWeek. I was casually standing around fiddling with my camera when a really sweet woman started chatting with me. After we spoke for a while about the event and how great it was, I asked her name. It turned out that she was Yulia Raquel, the designer of Igigi one of my favorite lines! I began to gush about her line (I’m kind of obsessed) and she just laughed “Plus size women deserve the best!” she said. Isn’t she beautiful?!

Over all the night was pretty fun… some of you may remember that I had an awesome time New York Fashion Week this year in Bryant Park, and I must say Full Figured Fashion Week is very different. I was hoping to see lines that pushed the envelope and to have more of a fashion show experience. To me last night was more of a party with plus size clothing as the guest of honor. I wasn’t prepared for that, but once I realized what was going on, I didn’t mind. Of course I don’t expect Haute Couture from mainstream brands like Just My Size, but I definitely wanted to see things that I hadn’t seen before.

To me, there was one designer who really showed me fresh, new fashion. Her name is LC Skinner and her line is called “Chan.nel Karama“. When her models came out, the crowd went nuts because her pieces were just unexpected and phenomenal!

The energy that came from her show was ridiculous… I found myself screaming “YES! YES! YES!” in appreciation of what was coming down the runway. Again, this was nothing like NYFW in Bryant Park! The Chan.nel Karama line is definitely edgy (imagine Rhianna’s stylist dressing a Plus Size Princess). But there were pieces that anyone could wear. I wasn’t able to touch them or anything, so I cant say too much about the quality, but it looked well made.

I’m looking at her Mod Diva Collection right now and its really impressive. I’m super excited to see/hear more from Chan.nel Karama and when I do, I will share it with you!

Happy Full Figured Fashion Week!

P.S. In Honor of FFFWeek, I’ll be doing some more Twitter Giveaways! Make sure you follow @thebiggirlblog for updates, photos and free clothes!

I. Hate. My. Arms.

When it comes to Plus Size Princesses and our arms, I think we all have a cross to bear. From my observation, its either flab or stretch marks or both! I’ve seen PSP’s with big arms but they somehow managed to maintain some shape, definition, but those girls are few and far between. Most of us are either trying not to move too much so our “bat wings” don’t wiggle or we’re praying that we don’t end up with stretch marks from our collar bones to our elbows.

Honestly, I feel like I’m right in the middle. I’ve seen flabbier arms than mine… I’ve seen stretch marks in more abundance… but when it comes to my arms, they’re still one of my least favorite body parts.

This summer, I’ve found myself in a predicament: I hate my arms, but I love clothes! and my love of clothes has made me realize that throwing a shrug over all my summer dresses just isn’t cute anymore (for me). I’ve noticed that shrugs take away from dresses and make them seem more casual than they are. As I continue to evolve in my fashion and style, I can’t keep falling back on the same fat coverage tricks I used in high-school, so its time to step my game up.

But, what’s a big girl to do? Push-ups? Arm Curls? …Shake Weights?! All of those are good plans, for some long term Michelle-Obama-Arm goals, but I’m wondering if, for right now, maybe I should just… get over it.

I think I need to wear my halter tops, strapless dress and sleeveless shirts without shrugs, with confidence, when I want to. Its going to be hard… but if I continue to encourage all of you not to “wait on your weight” I have to push myself to do the same. Last night I wore a sleeveless dress to an event with no shrug or cardigan and I got just as many compliments on my dress as I would any other night.

Full Figured Fashion Week starts on Wednesday night and I think this would be a good time for me to rock some of my cocktail dresses and other pieces that I love sans-shrug.

I think I’m going to need some support on this one… what do you think? With the summer coming, do YOU struggle with your arms?

One of my readers is a guy named Mike Lowrey (side note: Mike, if you’re reading this, you should email me… I think you’re fascinating). Mike leaves comments that keep me thinking. He “keeps it real”, isn’t afraid to tell me what I need to hear and he gives a great peak into the males perspective PSP’s/women in general. Mike commented on Business Card: Exhibit C the other day, and here’s what he said:

When we hand a woman a business card alone it is like saying, “you’re cute but I’m not interested enough in you to get your number or to actually give you my cell number.” If you call cool, and if I’m bored one day we can chill. If you don’t call, who cares. If a guy is into you he’s going to get your number, give you his and give you his business card just in case. This also allows the guy to show the woman he has a career and not just a 9-5 job. Every so often I will give out my card just to save time. It lets her know that I’m interested. From there if she’s interested too, she’ll call. But mostly we don’t care if the business card chick ever calls.

After the Famous Photographer let things fizzle, I waited to see if Apple Store Guy would prove me wrong. After taking his business card, I went home and emailed him. I sent a short email saying that it was nice to see him again, “I have a bad habit of losing business cards, so I wanted to reach out while your card is still accessible…” I wrote. I got an email back from him the next day saying that it was good to run into me too “Since you’re bad at keeping business cards, here’s my phone number…” he replied.

At that moment I knew it was over. Apple Store Guy kept pushing the ball into my court, which I’m not into, but for the sake of my business card experiment- I pressed on. I quickly replied “thanks, here’s my number…” and pushed Apple Store Guy into the back of my mind.

Two days later, he called.

Well, actually he sent me a text. I told him that I wasn’t much of a texter. Then he called.

Anyway, we chatted for a bit. The conversation was mediocre at best. Apple Store Guy asked me THREE of my Five Most Annoying Dating Questions and when we ended the call he asked if I wanted to see a movie sometime.

That was weeks ago, and I haven’t heard from him since.

Basically, I feel that my instincts were right. A business card shows lukewarm interest or no interest at all. Either way, I don’t think I’ll be following up the next time a man slips a business card into my hand.

Yesterday, as I rode the bus up Amsterdam avenue a blonde haired, blue eyed man with a gentle Hungarian accent struck up a conversation with me. His eyes sparkled as we chatted and he looked at me in the way that guys do when they’re attracted to you. I have a bad habit of flirting back when people flirt with me, so it wasn’t until he slooowly got up to get off of the bus that I snapped back to reality: this Hungarian charmer was easily 60 years old.

Now, this was a harmless encounter with an old man that had a Sean Connery type style and I would have loved to have met him 30-35 years ago when he was in his prime. Sadly, a fun, flirty run in with a Hungarian Grandpa is a rarity for me because I usually attract a different kind of AARP member.

Fact: Old men like big girls.

Fact: Dirty old men love big girls.

You know the men I’m talking about… the old men with receding hairlines and a stomach so big it looks like they’re about to give birth. The ones who haven’t had a job since 1979 and spend their afternoons “hanging out” on the corner. These are the men who love to approach a plus size princess on her way home from work and say things like mmmm… you look so sexy in those heels, do you need someone to give you a foot massage tonight, baby? Or who call out to their friends I’ll see ya’ll later, here comes my wife! while they follow you to the subway station on a Friday night asking if they can come to the party.

When I would attend the BBW parties in the city, there were always a few Seniors in attendance. Watching them dance was often awkward because they dance from a completely different generation. There’s a lot of hand holding, spinning and two-stepping when you dance with an older man, and it ends up feeling like you’re at a wedding dancing with your Uncle Joe.

Every old man was once a young man. But something tells me these grandpa’s weren’t hollering at thick chicks back in the day. What makes these men only appreciate PSP’s in their old age? I feel like there’s more to the old man/big girl connection, but I really can’t put my finger it. Here’s my speculation, and you all are more than welcome to chime in with your thoughts:

I’ve heard a lot of older women talk about how in their old age that start to live their lives and not care what other people think. (i.e. the red hat society). We all know the cliche of the guy who likes big girls but is too embarrassed to actually be with one. This is a long shot, but maybe… just maybe, in their old age, these men start to realize that life is too short to deny yourself of what you like.

Maybe in their old age they are confident enough to go after what they want.

Of course, if men realized they could be attracted to Plus Size Princesses before they were candidates for Viagra, Fixadent and Depends, it would make PSP’s feel much better about ourselves….

Thoughts???