This morning Robert noticed that the price tags on my brand new sweater were visible through the knit. Too lazy to take the sweater off, I turned my back to him “Can you just tear it off?” I asked. He reached down the back of my top, carefully ripped the price tag and extra button off and handed it to me.

It wasn’t until an hour later that I realized I’d given him access to my clothing size without a second thought. For some of you this might sound like nothing, but for me its a huge deal. Not only because I let him see what size I wore, but because I’ve always had a very strange relationship with clothing tags.

You see up until the past year or so, none of my clothes had tags on them. I’m not talking about the price tags, everyone takes those off. I’m talking about the tag with a number on it that identifies what size dress/pants/sweater you have. For as long as I can remember I would rush home after a shopping trip, grab the scissors and cut the sizes off of everything I bought. The numbers 18… 20 … or 24 had no place in my closet (even if they applied to me) so I cut the numbers off as a way of pretending that I wasn’t that size.

Silly, I know… but it’s what I did.

Denial feels really good sometimes.

So fast forward to this morning… with Robert removing my forgotten price tag. As I went to throw it away, I had to pause and acknowledge how far I’ve come in accepting myself as a Plus Size Princess. Not only did I purchase the sweater last night and skip my size cutting ritual, but I let the guy I’m dating remove the tag for me… letting him see the size that I am right now.

I’m proud of myself.

Do any of YOU do weird things with your clothes?

I was scrolling through instagram photos tagged with #PSPfit, Plus Size Princess Fitness Challenge and I came across a before/after shot that made my jaw drop. After seeing this photo I had to interview the girl who had clearly put in so much work and embodies what #PSPfit is all about. She tracks, she logs and she’s active on the #PSPfit twitter and instagram timelines. Best of all she inspires me and I hope she will inspire you too, Meet Kiya!

Disclaimer: Before starting any diet or weight loss program, consult a doctor or your personal physician. I am not an expert, a dietitian, a physical trainer, nor are any of the #PSPfit members featured here. What works for them may not be right for you, so CONSULT A PHYSICIAN BEFORE YOU BEGIN A LIFESTYLE CHANGE THAT INCLUDES A CHANGE IN DIET AND/OR PHYSICAL ACTIVITY.

How much weight have you lost and how long did it take?
As of that picture, I had lost 75 lbs, and right now, I’m at 85lbs. I started messing around with losing weight in early March 2012, and got really serious with it in late April. I’m 5’4.5 (yes, that half inch matters!) and I started out at 240lbs. I was a 22/24 and now I’m a 10/12

Wow, that is so impressive… What’s your weight loss process?
In order to determine WHAT my calories are - I follow the Anything Goes Diet (by John Barban) - which basically means, I eat what I want. Anything I want. As long as it fits within my weekly calorie budget - I can have it. There is no such thing as a ‘forbidden’ food - merely high-calorie foods that I have to ‘budget’ for. It removes the pressure of ‘falling off the wagon’.

I’m finding that eating plans that don’t have ‘forbidden foods’ work best for me too… Do you use any apps?
My main support tools are two apps on my iPhone - LoseIt and FatWatch.

Do you have a workout plan?
You notice, I didn’t mention exercise. I didn’t exercise for most of my journey, and when I did, it was solely weightlifting (relatively heavy). I hate cardio with a deep and burning passion, and so I don’t do it. *lol* Besides, it makes more sense to me to NOT eat the additional calories in the first place.

OMG, so those before and after pictures are mostly from changing your eating habits? *faints* that puts things in perspective! Will you ever exercise?
I’ve started exercising now, because part of it was one of my rewards. I do many things including Krav Maga/yoga/weights and glaring at my treadmill once a week. *lol*

*wrygrin* I’ve either gotten compliments or silence - no real in-between reactions. Folks didn’t start noticing until I hit about the 60lb mark, and when I hit 70lbs the floodgates of comments opened. I’ve gotten a couple ‘don’t get too small’ comments, and my response has been ‘If I DO get too small, it’s REAL easy to get big again!’ which shuts them up nicely. My mama told me I could admit to her if I got gastric bypass done on the low. *lol* One of my good friends said that even though I was SO much smaller, my spirit still filled the room.

Awww that’s sweet! Has #PSPfit been helpful?
I just recently FOUND #PSPFit - and it’s definitely been encouraging! I love having a ‘reason’ to track various elements of my journey - even though now, a lot of them are ‘habits’ rather than ‘challenges’.

How has your weight-loss affected your fashion?
Oh, dear gods. *lol* It’s weird - I’ve radically shifted how I dress, because I can FIT the stuff I’ve always wanted to wear now. I’m really looking forward to reaching goal so that I can start investing in some really nice pieces.

How has weight-loss affected your dating life?
*laugh* It hasn’t - I don’t date. I was married for almost 10 years, got divorced in late 2010, and I’m so happily NOT dealing with the opposite sex (or any sex!) right now - it’s heavenly peaceful and restorative, and provides me with the time that I need to reshape myself - inside and out!

Gods, there’s so much! Urm. Don’t worry about breaking your metabolism - it’s virtually unbreakable. Skip listening to what ‘everyone’ knows (but yet works for so few people) and find/read the science behind a lot of the fitness tall tales that WILL keep you fat.

Treat yourself! My goal reward is a GORGEOUS sapphire ring I’ve had my eye on for years - it’s going to be my ‘championship’ ring of Victory.

Accept the fact that not everyone is going to support you. Some of the people who were silent - their reaction kinda hurt, but to be honest, it’s better than the people who started pushing food on me at every turn. *lol* It has nothing to do with YOU really - it’s just that you are changing, and you are being SUCCESSFUL at your change - and that makes them start to wonder if they should change, too. And most folks don’t like change.

And last but not least - You aren’t broken, you aren’t weak, you aren’t a failure - you’re human and part of the essence of humanity is imperfection. Accept that sometimes, we all stumble, but stand back up, and keep walking forward. Be more stubborn than yourself, and you’ll be able to reach the goals you desire.

Follow Kiya on twitter here

Wow, thanks for that Kiya… I’m so glad you’re a part of #PSPfit and I can’t wait to watch you hit more goals, I’m right behind you! lol (p.s. I lost 4 pounds this week )

How is everyone else doing? Also if you want to join the Plus Size Princess Fitness Challenge, leave your twitter handle in the comments section below and follow me on instagram “PlusSizePrincess”

I’ve been meeting more and more people who have undergone weight loss surgery and there’s something I’ve noticed. When we’re in mixed company and their weight loss comes up, it’s never a simple “I’ve lost ___ pounds”. Instead there is an explanation of the surgery they had, how it differs from other weight loss procedures and how/why they made the decision. I always wondered why they felt the need to go into such detail and now I think I’m starting to understand… they’re trying to fight the stigma attached to weight loss surgery because some people say weight loss surgery is cheating.

Weight loss surgery is a serious decision. I’ve seen people who’ve had surgery, gotten super skinny and then gained their weight right back because they used their new stomach as a crutch and not a tool. This lets us all know that it’s not a magical solution.

While I don’t think surgery is the best path for me I respect the work that is necessary to make weight loss surgery a success… not to mention the financial commitment of the surgery and the often needed body lift and tummy tuck… it’s not a cheap or easy process.

The Plus Size Princess Fitness Challenge is based on working out and eating well because those are the basics to slimming down as far as I’m concerned. Some of the #PSPfit girls are doing programs like weight watchers and jenny craig because that’s what works for them. Look up #PSPfit on twitter or Instagram and you will find a supportive group that’s growing every day… I just want to state for the record that weight loss surgery patients are welcomed to join us. We’d be happy to have you!

p.s. My weight stayed the same post thanksgiving, hooray!

I came across an old picture this weekend. The photo was taken when Robert and I were just starting to talk at work events (for those of you are new to TBGB, Robert and I met at work and had a slow progression from coworkers, to friends, to dating which you can scroll through here). Anyway, looking at the photo I’m sitting on a barstool and holding my purse in my lap.

If anyone had seen me in the bar that night, they would have assumed that I was just making sure my purse wasn’t stolen, but I know the truth. I was using one of my Plus Size Princess diversion techniques… holding my purse in my lap, to hide my stomach. Thinking back, if I’m feeling self conscious about my body especially around a guy I will grab something and hold it in front of me… a purse, a pillow, a coat… I’ll even sit side-saddle on a bar stool, putting the back of the bar stool between me and the rest of the bar because it makes me feel more comfortable.

Even though in the moment, I feel like these body covering moves help… they really don’t. A pillow in front of my stomach makes me feel better but it doesn’t make me any smaller and if you saw the photo of me clutching my purse for dear life, you’d see how little it was really covering my trouble spots.

I have to remind myself that when I do crazy things to “cover” myself, I often end up calling more attention to myself. If I wear a big t-shirt in the pool, its way more obvious than if I just wear a bathing suit and keep it moving. If I wear a shrug to cover my arms, it takes away from my sleeveless dresses and tells the world, “I hate my arms! See! I’m covering them up!!”. Like the time I decided to just get naked at the gym, when I remember that its impossible to hide my fat… life becomes more simple.

Thankfully, I’ve become more comfortable with Robert and I can sit around him with nothing in my lap to cover me, but I wonder if those habits would come back if I were to start dating someone new. Hopefully not!

Do you do weird things to cover/hide your body in different situations?

I hate talking about bodily functions, but I can’t tell this story without it. *hides face*

A few Novembers back, I was in a “woe is me” weight loss mood and in my desperation, I scooped up a starter pack of Alli, the first FDA approved over the counter weight loss pill. I skimmed over the directions (take with food… low-fat diet… blah blah blah) and jumped right into the bottle with hopes of ending the year a few pounds lighter than I was.

I was doing fine, taking the pills with each meal and working out. Then I went to Pennsylvania for Thanksgiving…

In the middle of cooking Thanksgiving dinner, we were starving so we drove through taco bell for a quick bite while we finished the meal. Normally, I would order a burrito and a mexican pizza but I was on Alli and eating better so I just ordered a bean burrito and took my Alli pill with it. That’s when it all went terribly wrong.

I ate the burrito in the car and 20 minutes later started to feel kind of… gasy *blush*. I thought nothing of it until I went to use the bathroom. For a second I thought I had started my period and stained my underwear, but… it was orange… and greasy. Then I looked in the toilet and oh… em… gee… You know when you’re cooking and you put oil in water and it the oil puddles just float in the water? Well, it looked just like that. Yuck.org!

Although I was with family, there was no way I was going to burst into the kitchen and ask “why am I leaking orange grease?!” so I ducked into my room, changed clothes and I quickly googled stuff on my phone. That’s when realized that I must have had too much fat in my body and the Alli pill was like Um, no girl… it doesn’t work like this and forced the fat out of my body without my permission in the form of icky greasy puddles.

From my google research, I learned that I had gotten off easy… some people had actually pooped their pants after taking Alli and eating too much fat. Interestingly a lot of the women who had pooped their pants taking Alli, were sharing tips like “wear a pad or diapers!” or “wear dark pants!” my solution to greasy gas and the possibility of pants pooping was more simple… stop taking Alli!

I’ve learned more about my body and PCOS, so I know that carbs and sugar are my weight gain triggers, not fat. I also don’t eat a high fat diet, so Alli really isn’t for me. As I continue with the Plus Size Princess Fitness Challenge, I keep reminding myself that there are no quick fixes to weight loss and even if you do find one it might turn out to be pretty, um… crappy!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING, LOVELIES!

xoxo

The Plus Size Princess Fitness Challenge is technically over next week… but I’m thinking maybe we should keep this going as a weekly challenge for health/fitness/weight loss.

I love the accountability of the #PSPfit crew, see you guys on instagram all sweaty at the gym and cooking yummy meals is fantastic and it keeps me motivated.

A gold star #PSPfit week would be:

• Working out 4 times per week (Yes, FOUR)
• Following our favorite healthy eating plan (Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, Clean Eating, Eat Right for your Type, anything goes!)
• Taking Photos of our meals and posting them on Instagram or Twitter with the #PSPfit hashtag
• Tweeting our workouts (what we did and for how long) using the #PSPfit hashtag

Anyone want to keep it going? Leave a comment on this post with your twitter handle and I’ll add you to the list. (my twitter: @thebiggirlblog my instagram: @PlusSizePrincess)

On another note, I’m really trying to get a handle on my eating. I had a perfect eating day this week and I’m so proud of myself… for eating well and staying full here’s what I had on Tuesday for lunch and dinner:

;

When I decided to jump into a 30 day fitness challenge, I knew there was going to be one week that was RUINED, that week has arrived because Aunt Flow is in town (pass the tylenol & heating pads!).

I have PCOS, so I never ever take it for granted when my period comes but I definitely have to buckle down because its guaranteed that I will gain 2-9 pounds. I will get on the scale Tuesday to get a more accurate weigh-in, but in the meantime here are some #PSPfit girls who have been rocking it and shedding pounds! (My Instagram: PlusSizePrincess, use the #PSPfit tag to join us!)

The Plus Size Princess Fitness Challenge is in full swing and watching you girls work out and eat right is so awesome.

How did you guys do this week? Any losses, gains or good moments?

This has been an intense week here in New York City. A lot of you reached out to me via twitter, facebook, email, etc. to see how I was braving the hurricane. The short answer is that I’m fine, safe and sound, thank God. While my office isn’t ready for us to return to just yet, my apartment is in upper Manhattan, so the flooding/fallen trees/power loss has been minimal. I actually ended up turning my place into a hotel for some friends who needed a place to stay.

While prepping to be stuck in my apartment for days, I realized that I wouldn’t be hitting the gym, so if I wanted to lost the 2 pounds I mentioned last week I’d have to watch my eating in a serious way. Here’s what I did:

1.) I did not drink during the hurricane. Lots of people were stocking up on wine and beer. While my wine rack is fully stocked, I decided that because I wasn’t burning my usual amount of calories, I couldn’t afford to drink anything but water.

2.) I skipped carb-filled munchies. During Hurricane Irene last year, I bought a lot of crackers/cookies. This time, I focused on proteins. I munched on seaweed snacks and almonds between meals.

3.) I kept moving! A friend was kind enough to send me one of those crazy workout DVD’s via email, so I went through that on day one of Sandy. Then on day two when we were allowed to go outside, I went on a 4 mile walk.

These three steps helped me to lose 2 pounds this week! I also was able to fit into a sweater that was too small when I purchased it last season:

The #PSPfit participants on instagram and twitter have been super inspirational, “@_Chunk_” lost 5 pounds during week one!

I also love seeing the #PSPfit hastag on Instagram blowing up with curvy girls breaking a sweat and looking fantastic! Shoutouts to “@skinnyminority”, “CoogieCruz” and “shortiesensei”

The #PSPfit girls on Instagram & Twitter also make some yummy food choices, like “@Kiyasjoy” who always has a veggie with her sanwiches at work instead of chips or french fries. *waving hi* to “@stellarcanicula”, “@blkgrlsdontdate” too! That’s one of my lunches on the bottom right Instagram “@plussizeprincess”

How did you guys do this week? Any weight loss/gains?